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Being Dumped, Just Plain Sucks!
By Dorothy
Being Dumped, Just Plain Sucks!
By Dorothy
Hurricanes really suck. Even if they do not reach you, they
still threaten your safety net. Florida survived last years
attack of Mother Nature, so we are a little more courageous
this year. Not much, but a little. I would love to meet the
person that pissed her off (Mother Nature). Not only does
she get even, but she does it with a vengeance. That's like
PMS & Menopause all rapped up. So, for all you poor souls
that are in for that ride(PMS & Manopause), and have no clue
what it is all about, think hurricane. It can turn in a
second and destroy you. Oh, and it has many names also, like
bitch, nag, crazy, nuts, annoying, female, insane, messed
up, pms'ing, hallucinating, on drugs, stupid bitch, mentally
challenged, and that's just a few, except they are not in an
alphabetical order like the hurricanes. OK so we are
disorganized. BITE ME! You seriously have to be PMS`ing to
be able to understand (winks). I can only hope that everyone
gets as many laughs as I have so far typing this.
OK, now onto more serious matters in life. Today I
received a question from a guy. Here is what he said:
"Posted by Anonymous
The last woman I was involved with was quite full of
herself.
So then why did she dump me?"
And my answer to him was this... "Posted by Dorothy
Hey there, sorry to hear about your being dumped. Not
knowing either of you, it is really hard to answer that
question. There are many reasons for people walking away
from a relationship. It could have plain worn out. Also they
could have found someone else. Either way, it sucks, and you
have to deal with the pain, and learn to get on with your
life. It is a challenge, but it does make you aware, of what
being human is all about. There is a saying; "If it doesn`t
kill you. it will only make you stronger." Also I am a firm
believer in: " Things do happen for a reason." Hang in
there, things will get better, if you let them. Take Care
and thank you for sharing that with me."
"Being Dumped" really is one of the worst experiences,
short of death that we, as humans are faced with in our
lives. They say that, death of a loved one is easier to
learn to live with, than a break-up , "Being Dumped" or
rejection.
All of the above, tell us that we are unacceptable to
someone. We immediatley turn it into ourselves and that's
when the self-blame seed is sown. Through self-blame we
begin to feel shame. Shame is so painful, that no one talks
about it or even wants to think about it. Shame is the least
identified emotion we as humans deal with, because we are
ashamed of our shame. Shame, is yet another negative
emotion, that captures and imprisons us in a pit of hell. It
pulls us into a life of silence and inactivity, lying and
hiding our true fears. When we are rejected in any
situation, it is a true hit to our self-esteem. If we are
weak in that area, then our fall is going to be very hard.
If we are strong in that area, we will quickly become weak.
I wrote this in a recent blog:
"When we first fall in love; What is that saying, "Love is
Blind"? Ha! Now that's funny, because it really is blind. We
trust so instantly and genuinely that we potentially set
ourselves up
for the biggest fall in our lives. Why is that?
Is it because we are so driven by nature to want to trust
someone? Or is trusting someone just a happier, easier, way
of life."
So there it is, we as humans, live to love and want to be
loved. We are blinded by the romance of the word ~ LOVE~. We
are made happy by the word~LOVE~, but we are also hurt by
the word ~LOVE~. So why do we continually set ourselves up?
We are gambling, and we do not even know it. Or, is life
simply just that, a gamble? The bottom line is, no one wants
to get "DUMPED", because it is not in our nature to know how
to accept it. How many of you have been, "DUMPED" and just
knew that your life had ended? You just knew that you will
never see anything the same again. Well, you were partly
correct there. It is like any other change in our lives.
Things will be different than we are use to. Your life has
definitely not ended. Yes, your partnership has ended with a
person, and maybe it was not expected, but nor are
hurricanes or wars. We deal with it all, we have to. We
chose to survive. Think of it as starting a new life.
Newness is positive and healthy. Look at things differently,
and embrace all that newness. Do not fear it. "BEING
DUMPED", is just another chapter in your book of life. If
you had no chapters, think how dull your book would be. Now,
you can open your self to another chapter, and believe me,
there are many. If you spend the rest of your life wondering
all the "WHY`S", just think, you have wasted even more of
your precious time on something that has chosen another
road. As for the fact that a person is, full of themselves,
that really has nothing to do with the "Why's" of "Being
Dumped". Even the most confident people close doors on
relationships. They in fact, have more courage to do so than
a person of less confidence, or being less full of
themselves, so to speak. Who Knows? All we know is that the
decision has been made and you as a person, with
intelligence, must turn the page. Getting stuck in that
feeling just makes therapists rich. (wink) Life offers
many, many humps and bumps. We trip and fall, over and over
again. The trick is to get real good at picking yourself up
and dusting off the old dirt. This is life. I told my
daughter, when she was struck by her first cupids arrow, "If
you are going to get emotionally involved, be prepared to
get emotionally uninvolved." It's life! One very important
thing we must remember; when we are at the bottom and we
feel we are worthless and will never ever TRUST again, it's
is a nothing more than a human emotion. We know it as doubt.
We can over come doubt very easily. Look in the mirror, and
tell yourself, that you are UNIQUE, and you are going to
make happiness your goal. You must risk all the falls to
reach that goal. Letting yourself believe that you are
deserving of another relationship is truly a risk, again
another gamble. But what is life without a little risk? We
have the power to overcome our negative self. We just need
to DO IT!!
"Self doubt is not an option!
Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we often
might gain
by fearing attempt."
Shakespear Article Source: http://www.articlecube.com Dorothy LafrinereOwner/Operator Website- www.womensselfesteem.com Forum- womenselfesteem.proboards29.com
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